“She always believed people only see what they wanted to see, and it’s that thought that invaded her mind as she went through her friend’s words in her mind. Those around her saw only her quietness, her seemingly calm beauty, her polite chatter, a smile that gave the impression of an embarrassed child, her wise use of time, her etiquette, her cultured-self, her apparent peaceful state of mind regarding the past and fear of having the happiness of the present robbed by the over-thinking about the future, and most importantly, how she seems to have cooked-up the world’s greatest plan to achieve her dreams.
She craned her head in sorrow for herself, knowing she shouldn’t let any of that superficial talk get to her. “Nobody really knows.”, she repeated to herself. Nobody knows how hard she struggles to keep her face straight as she listens to the small minds of those around her ranting about her. Those who think just because she talks without whimpering about the past, that she has reached ultimate peace with her previous life. They believed she’d found the magic recipe for living with harmony with the old life. The ones who seem to think she’s doing the right thing not worrying too much about the future, have no idea how void she feels her inside is, how hallow it has become because of trying to remove any drip of hope she might have regarding anything and anyone, to just replace it with indefinite hope to prevent her soul from falling into a deep hole of disappointment. They have no idea how painful it is to give up on everything she knows so she could have hope in what she doesn’t know, to put her hope solely on the dependable, God, and turn her back to humans who have brought nothing but misery to her.”