Best friend chores!

It’s been ever since I had ten years of age, I’ve been doing the best friend chores. It seems rather uncoordinated, to put the two idioms together in the same sentence. How can being a best friend become a chore?

Let me give you the answer to that, it happened about six times now and I believe trial no. seven is in order, I don’t know if there were other times to be counted since I decided to just drop the counting. It’s been since I was ten indeed that I would be faithful to my best friend, at that time, and I don’t mean that in general I’d stab them in the back or something but you know how they say that a relationship – no matter it’s ranking – needs effort from both sides? Well, it seems as though I’m the one who keeps exerting the effort till the end. Till the very last time I talked to my same-aged best friend on the phone back then I haven’t stopped once from putting her above all the new friends I made when countries separated us!

It wasn’t until the start of college that I realized it was happening all over again, I keep exerting the effort and there’s nothing in return but more blood-boiling nonsense. I know they say that if you consider someone a best friend then no topic is off-limits and you can tell them anything. May be that’s the thing, when I tried to speak in any of those failures, a surge of guilt went through me for bringing clouds into the clear sky of my friend’s world! Or perhaps it had something to do with the unbelievably out-of-space responses that I got, that I decided to stop talking and just be a best friend.

It seems unfair to some, but when I think about the promises each of them made that they will always be there no matter what, that I can always count on them and they will be there for me, they are all empty words. Words are easy to say, and I can splurge out all the exact same promises each “best friend” said and failed to act upon. It’s not hard btw, it’s not hard not to make the promise if you won’t act upon it. You can say I’m a little harsh but if you consider someone to be that close to you as they did me, then the least you owe such a person is to apologize that you are just re-organizing your priorities and being best friends is not at the top of that list anymore!That is the least they should do!

And since I lost feeling towards anyone who now considers me a best friend, it can have it’s affect on my actions. Because now, the things we used to do, and I used to do them with every bit of my heart, they are just hallow actions. They are just like chores, you have to do them whether you like it or not! Though it’s very difficult, more difficult than you can imagine, when you have someone who is still making those promises and you just have to process them in your heart in a way that won’t give it hope. Because they will leave too, so I might as well be ready this time.

Or you can just say that it’s my problem, I’m a little too faithful and people never realize you’re doing something for them until you’ve stopped doing it! Bla bla bla bla ……………

-A

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